Butterfly Effect

Here comes the future

Here comes the past

Here comes days of our lives thrown like knives at our back

Here comes tomorrow

Here comes the sun

Here comes our last chance to break free and run

 

We don’t want to waste our sunrises

Waiting for sunsets

Today is as good as

Any day will get

We are tough

We are strong

Waiting for the mocking bird

To sing his morning song

But the joke’s on us

 

Tell me yesterday will be better

I can’t wait for it much longer

Hope my faith is getting stronger

With each step I take

I’m awake and flying

Ahead to my own wake

Hopefully I’m awake longer

Than it takes

I’d rather be dead

Than wasting the day away

No more bones, no more homes

To build a moat around

And set a fire to dream dread

 

If time travel worked

I’d be the first in line

To turn back to the day

My cracks turned to the outside

Then I’d go to the future

Change that one thing that I missed

Let the butterfly effect do it’s part

So I won’t always be like this

One moment changes it all

 

Tell me yesterday will be better

I can’t wait for it much longer

Hope my faith is getting stronger

With each step I take

I’m awake and flying

Ahead to my own wake

Hopefully I’m awake longer

Than it takes

I’d rather be dead

Than wasting the day away

No more bones, no more homes

To build a moat around

And set a fire to dream dread

 

Here comes the past

Here comes the future too

Here comes my will stop wishing life was through

Here comes the memories

Here comes gasoline

Here comes burning down each bridge I have in me

My Favorite Friend

Brush the dust off your patched jeans

Come along, dive in with me

The ocean looks like it’s too deep

But we’ll touch the sea shelled floor   

 

Falling head over heels

We’ll take off our training wheels

My heart is yours to steal

And I’ll keep yours forever more

 

Open up the unlocked door

 

Let me enter your daydreams

You endlessly jump into mine

This trampoline bounces too high

But I’m not coming down

I’m ready to touch the clouds

You make me feel alive again

My first in line, my favorite friend

I’ll bend over backwards for you

 

Treehouse mates and dinner plates

Broken glass and writing slates

Writing notes until it’s late

Then the floor caves in

 

We float looking at the ground

The whole world has turned upside down

Gravity gave up its crown

Asking “Where have you been?”

 

“We’ve been caught up in the wind”

 

Let me enter your daydreams

You endlessly jump into mine

This trampoline bounces too high

But I’m not coming down

I’m ready to touch the clouds

You make me feel alive again

My first in line, my favorite friend

 

We’ll stay up and we’ll go low

When we stop, no one will know

No even us, no where to go

 

Let me enter your daydreams

You endlessly jump into mine

This trampoline bounces too high

But I’m not coming down

I’m ready to touch the clouds

You make me feel alive again

My first in line, my favorite friend

Mandatory Fun: A Night With Weird Al

I had some mandatory fun last night. No, it wasn’t forced on me. I wasn’t pushed to throw a frisbee or jump in a bouncy house. I was at a concert.

Mandatory Fun is the title of “Weird Al” Yankovic’s newest album. He is currently touring the world on the Mandatory Concert tour, and his latest stop was last night, where I saw him. Let me just say it wasn’t your typical concert.

Yankovic’s claim to fame is making parodies of popular songs and making them come alive. It might not sound like it would be interesting to go see somebody make fun (in a good way) of songs that most everybody alive has heard, but it truly was.

Each song came with a costume change, an elaborate one at that. There were octopus ones, a fat suit, the famous suit from the Blurred Lines performance, and other wacky ensembles.

The costumes weren’t the only wacky thing about the show. Yankovic puts on a hilarious show. As an accordion wielding, polka-loving, self-proclaimed weirdo, you never know what to expect next. Whether is be his arms shaking like they have no bones or his words that somehow fit perfectly with the tune of another song, the only predictable thing about Weird Al is that the show will be unpredictable.

As I have mentioned, there were many costume changes. This meant that Yankovic had to leave stage for about a minute a lot during the show. It was not a boring wait, however. There was a screen at the back of the stage that would play clips from various shows and other places Yankovic had appeared sometime in his career. It’s obvious to say that with him in the videos, it was a full break.

My favorite song was Smells Like Nirvana, a take iff of Nirvana’s song Smells Like Teen Spirit. It basically made fun of how you couldn’t understand Kurt Cobain’s (Nirvana’s lead singer) singing. I love Nirvana, so I found this hilarious.

The encore was amazing. Yankovic brought out Stormtroopers, Darth Vader, and himself dressed as a jedi to sing The Saga Begins, based off of “American Pie”. My dad was super excited for this one. They finished out with a song basd around Yoda. The whole encore was Star Wars- palooza.

Overall, it was a feel-good night full of twists and surprises. My family enjoyed themselves and it seemed like the whole crowd did as well. I’ll end this post the same way the show did with a

“Yoda, yo yo Yoda”
Have mandatory fun, I did

Music Soothes The Soul

 

TW: Self-Harm

Some songs are just for fun. Sometimes, songs speak to you. I have several songs that I listen to because I love them for the simple reason that they are catchy, but today I’m not sharing those songs. No, today is a day of meaningful music. The songs that make me feel understood. The songs that make me feel less alone. The songs that make me happy when nothing else can.

Here are a few examples

 

The 1975- Paris

Emotional Lyrics:  

  1. Mr. Serotonin Man, lend me a gram; You call yourself a friend?
  2. here was a party that she had to miss , Because her friend kept cutting her wrists

 

Troye Sivan- Happy Little Pill

Emotional Lyrics:

  My happy little pill

  Take me away;

  Dry my eyes

  Bring colour to my skies

  My sweet little pill

  Tame my hunger

  Light within

 Numb my skin

 

twenty one pilots- Doubt


Emotional Lyrics-

  Scared of my own image

  Scared of my own immaturity

  Scared of my own ceiling

  Scared I’ll die of uncertainty

  Fear might be the death of me

  Fear leads to anxiety

  Don’t know what’s inside of me

 

All of these songs are on at least one of my playlists I listen to all of the time with the last two on many, many playlists. They help me feel calm (Paris), supported (Happy Little Pill), and understood (Doubt). Music is my main coping skill. It’s what keeps me going. Every song has a unique meaning, and these are the most relatable, at least for me. Listen to your own music. Breathe along, and tell yourself that you are okay. With music around, I know others feel how I do. It is relieving.
Keep on listening to whatever music you like for your own reasons. We each have our own.

Ms. Jenkins, the Dream Catcher

Adventures most always end with a surprise. That’s how it happened today.

After deciding to go see a movie out right now,  Florence Foster Jenkins, we had some trouble actually getting to see the movie. First, we went to the theater we normally go to. We had checked the website to see when the movie was playing  and it said it was being shown at 1:05 PM. We got to the theater at 12:20 PM. as we are always early to places. There were only two cars in the parking lot, us and my grandmother’s friend. We soon realized that the place was closed and the movie was not being shown at the theater any more. We ended up having to go to another theater. Once we got there, I was excited, but wasn’t sure what it would be like.

Florence Foster Jenkins is based off of the life of a woman by the same name. She was prominent in the music world. All she wanted to be was an opera singer. She hired an accompanist to sing with her. Let’s just say she was not the greatest singer in the world. However, she kept trying, even through sickness. I’m not going to give much more, as I don’t want to spoil the movie.

I laughed many, many times, and I don’t normally laugh out loud at movies. I teared up a lot as well. For some reason, I related with Florence.

She believed she had a beautiful opera voice. She continued on, even when she felt terrible, trying to follow her dreams. She had people acting like they loved her voice, but others showed their distaste quite loudly, through laughter. Once she realized how people really felt, she felt terrible. However, she continued on and didn’t stop doing what she loved.

It might not be that I relate to Florence. I might be that I aspire to be like her. She was resilient. While she suffered from a physical illness, we can transfer that over to mental illness. We might have people laughing at us. We might have people trying to bring us down. We can’t give up though. I want to be able to fight using my voice. Though my voice might be through social media, or my writing. I am showing my voice. I don’t have physical people bringing me down, but the voices in my head tell me how terrible I am. Just last night, I was crying and telling my parents that I hated myself. I still believe I do. Florence didn’t let her opponents bring her down. The voices in our head, or the voices screaming in our ears, shouldn’t be enough to bring us down. Whether mental or physical illness, awful singing voice or having a hard time raising our voice, we can’t let our demons get in our way. Florence didn’t. She sang until she couldn’t any more. Even though she believed her voice to be much better than it was, it wasn’t that way. Things aren’t always as they seem.

Florence’s accompanist, Cosmé McMoon, was inspirational as well. He worked with Florence throughout everything. She recognized her poor voice, but never failed to show up to help her with his music. He tried to get out of performing with her, as he was afraid he’d become a laughingstock. However, he stayed with her and was at her performances, played on her record, and became close to her. He wanted what was best for her, even though he couldn’t always get through. We are lucky if he have someone like him in our life, especially if we need to change. We are often stubborn, or least I know I am. We don’t listen. He didn’t tell her to her face most of the time, and was told to not be honest. He let her live her dream, even if he didn’t completely approve.

Florence’s husband was the epitome of unconditional love. He had some struggles staying true to her, but he always helped her and loved her. We can learn from him that sticking by someone’s side when they are like Florence can be hard, but he sated with her through each performance and each fall of health.

I left feeling changed. It was hilarious, but it was also heartfelt. It was delightful, but also deep. Florence is who I aspire to be. Cosmé is who I aspire to have in a friend. Her husband is who I aspire to act like when a friend is in a tough situation. I have it tough, but so do you. So does everyone! We all have our own problems, but Florence can show us a road map to becoming a dream catcher.

Yes, it was a surprise at the end of this adventure. We left hoping for a good movie, and left with hope in our heart for a better tomorrow.

Joker’s Smile

The Joker’s smile

Won’t disappear

From my head

Grins from ear to ear

Blood coming from his mouth

 

I have a frown from jaw to jaw

Blood coming from my ears

As I wish away his white face

Wait for it to disappear

 

I can’t stand to be

Turned into Miss Harley

I don’t want to be pushed around

Have my life turned upside down

There is no way

I’ll turn into

The monster that

You want me to be

So let me slide

Say goodbye

To that Joker’s smile

 

My skins is pale

Just like mid December

Your face is getting brighter

With the sunlight in September

I’m stuck inside

 

I’m locked inside a jail cell

That you drove me into

Don’t push me down the stairwell

Or you’ll be coming too

I can’t stand to be

Turned into Miss Harley

I don’t want to be pushed around

Have my life turned upside down

There is no way

I’ll turn into

The monster that

You want me to be

So let me slide

Say goodbye

To that Joker’s smile

 

Teeth that show will not bite

But those inside come out at night

You let me see the fake you

And your smirk was always there

I’m not going anywhere, but

 

I guess I have changed for good

Turned into Miss Harley

I live my life all pushed around

My life has turned upside down

There is no way

I’ll let myself stay

The monster that

I have become

So let me go

You will say no

I’ve given in

To that Joker’s smil

Simple Songs

Simple songs

Cannot be wrong

When simple words

Shows one their worth

 

Sheets that read

Go with the beat

Makes your heart

Fix broken parts

 

Violins and horns

Pull out the thorns

Stuck in your head

Sticks it instead

 

Guitar strings

Fix broken things

Where life should sit

Mends bit by bit

 

Take the ride

The one inside

Caused by a tone

You’re not alone

 

When music plays

Pain goes away

Drums pump your heart

Life will restart

 

Listen close

To every note

When hope is gone

Play simple songs